Yet another Day

Yet another day.
If this whole world was a big datawarehouse, I wonder how many batch jobs would have run today.Someone up there might have setup a 24X7 support team working hard to meet an SLA.
I hope they get aborts saying - "Duplicate human_idnt in human_dm table".
What do they do then? . They might filter out the duplicate human_idnt's. As a permanent fix they might add a group by or a distinct. Someone will do performance analysis of the code and suggest that distinct works faster on weekdays and group by on weekends.So they end up having a weekly job and a daily job. Pretty simple logic.

Maybe thats why you dont find two exactly same people in this world.I sense they've got a major enhancement coming up if Ian Wilmut's research flies high. Human Clone Release 1 will need an architecture level rework I guess.Hope somebody has already started working on the estimates.

I wonder how a human would be refered at an item level. I might raise my hand and ask - "Is it a white male of height 170 cm and weighing 85kg or is it a white male of height 170 cm ,weighing 85kg having a brain tumer?"
Someone would say "It depends.Depends on how they look at it".I might feel upset that I asked such a silly doubt.

And what all reports do they generate? I bet there would be a Daily Delete Dashboard and a Daily Insert Dashboard.There's got to be serious concerns over the daily insert/delete imbalance over the past many years.I have serious doubts that they are planning to run a yearly Tsunami job to handle this. I reckon the test run was very successfull.

Do they mess things up? I think they do. Last week I saw a lady on TV who eats mud.It seems she is a celebrity somewhere.Its obvious that the food attributes got updated from earthworm_dm in her case.Infact if you look around you can find many such anomalies.
Would you call me a racist if I doubt a monkey bug for Andrew Symond's and an obnoxious weed bug for Harbajan Singh?
My mom says me and my dog Chinnu looks the same when we get angry. Somebody up there has to be held responsible.

So what would have happened to me today? I hope my name comes up in the Salary Hike pending Dashboard.I hope nothing gets deleted by mistake or otherwise.
And as I scratch my head, there goes yet another day.