It was 9:30 in the morning and Subbu felt terribly bored. He could hear the Memoirs of Mahatma Gandhi rhyming in the background in a monotonous Kottayam accent. It was very evident that the Mahatma had little effect on Sunny sir's spirits. The class was silent and everybody had their eyes glued to their textbooks.Subbu looked out, scanning the corridor, searching for any “out standers”. Not a single one-Not even outside “Kamsan’s” dangerous darbar. He felt sad. Surely this isn’t going to be a good day for him. Even the boundary walls were clean of new literary ventures on Zeena madam’s anatomy.These calm mornings have always given way to torturous evenings in his case. The uneasiness started creeping in as Subbu zoomed out his vision back to the class. Drop a pin here and you could here it’s echo across the room.Everyone seemed to be so much interested in Mahatma Gandhi that Subbu simply couldn’t resist listening. Sunny sir was reading through the earlier ages of Gandhiji when suddenly the topic seemed to turn towards Subbu’s arena of interest. As Sir Sunny rushed through the passages involving Mahatma Gandhi eating mutton for lunch and visiting a brothel with his friend, Subbu looked around to spot some mumblings and giggles-but in vain.Even his buggy benchmate Suresh sat dumb and his sleepy eyes lay out of focus on “The Russian Revolution”.
Subbu felt some fresh wind inside.All this time, the thought of being the only stray idiot around had pricked his morale and now to find his best friend grazing over a history book in an English class room made him feel really good. He looked around in a victorious charm.
“OK Children Listen Up. There are lot of difficult words in this book that you don’t know.I am here to answer you.Start reading the passage” Sunny Sir raised his voice for once. Suresh jerked a little, looked at Subbu and got back to Russion Revolution.
Subbu started reading.As he read, he felt the pages getting blurred.The tiny black letters started to spread across his book and outside to the desk and the floor and then to the walls engulfing every little ray of light in the room.Everything went dark and a cold wind hit him.
Subbu felt the leaves crunch beneath his feet and the fog sweep over his face. He could see two long skinny legs moving before him.Subbu looked up to see a half naked man with a balled head and a walking stick in his left hand. From his right hand, started a rope which ended on Subbu’s neck.Subbu looked around in disbelief. He could see his hairy white body now and his four legs and he could feel his tail wag from behind.Subbu cried out loud but all he could hear was a long and loud “Mbeeeeeeeeeee”.The skinny bald man started pulling him harder as they crossed the shallow forest and reached an isolated river bank.
The bald man tied the rope to a tree stub and turned around- his long stick pointing skywards.As Subbu stared at the skinny face wondering where he had seen him before, he saw a glimpse of the long stick coming down fast.A sharp streak of light flashed in his eyes and everything went totally dark.
When he woke up, Subbu found himself falling down a lighly lit translucent tube.Is this some kind of a dream? Subbu wondered.He started to pich himself but his whole body was covered in some kind of sticky fluid that he couldn’t grip his own skin.
At the end of the tube , he could sense something burning-he could feel the heat.Where am I? Subbu wondered.Surely this isnt some water sport that he is in.This is his journey to hell.At the end of it lie the devil’s kitchen where he would get himself deep fried in boiling oil.A well deserved end for all his misdeeds.
As Subbu spiralled down throught the slimy hole, he heard some feeble sounds-like people talking.Subbu tried to listen.He could hear some women talking now.At first he thought those were his teacher’s.They would have been brought here to supervise the frying process – and make sure he doesn’t go down easily.But on closer notice , Subbu found that the talks were too abusive in nature to suit any of his teachers.These were street talks – abuses of the highest degree and since they sounded female, Subbu knew exactly who they were and he knew exactly what was happening to him.For all his mischiefs-for drawing monkeyface on the board-for cheating in class tests-for making up stories about Father Jose and Zeena madam-for nicknaming teachers and for all the other endless trouble he had caused in his little life, he is now being fried alive along with all the dirtiest whores of the streets.He could feel the fall getting faster.The talking ladies sounded more close. Any time now , he would be spiralled out into the hottest and filthiest death pool of hell.
Suboo gave one final cry “Mbeeeeeeeeeeeeee” and then another and then again.And as he continued crying his throat out, he felt the fall slowing down.The atmosphere started to get cooler.He could here some very soft voices outside now- as if someone whispering or praying perhaps.
The sticky tube started to become thinner and thinner as it finally melted away.Subbu was in free fall now.He could no longer hear the abusive ladies nor could he feel the death pool’s heat.An old male voice was still praying.For once Subbu felt as if it was the Devil himself praying for forgiveness.
Everything around turned white as snow and he felt as a snow flake waltzing its way down in the gentle breeze.He hoped this fall would never end.
“Standup you Idiot .Where is your English textbook?”
The snowflakes vanished in a second.The spirall tube,the prostitutes,the praying devil and the skinny bald man flashed before him one last time and a bunch of dark little letters started to crawl back into Subbu’s vision.
“I am asking you again-Where the hell is your English textbook?” Sunny sir was fuming as he churned Suresh’s large ear’s between his fingers.
“I forgot to bring it sir” Cried poor Suresh
“Ok.Then tell me what incident made Gandhiji become a vegetarian”.
As Suresh started to stammer, the next question was shot
“What did Mahatma Gandhi learn after going to the brothel”
By this time two of Suresh’s ears where doing circles under Sunny sir’s strong palms.
The bell rang just in time and poor little Suresh relaxed.
During lunch break Suresh asked Subbu
“Hey do u know why Gandhiji became vegetarian and what he did at the brothel?”
and Subbu said “Ofcourse I do. I was there when he did it”
As Suresh stared at him in utter discontend, Subbu smiled and said –“It’s a long story.I will tell you next class”
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Thursday, October 25, 2007
A Simple death
The blood on his offwhite shirt took a deep black shade in the moonlight.
It was a neat cut with the head a few feet away inside the track and the body lying outside on the belly.
A few years ago, he fell in love. A few months ago they got married.
A few minutes ago, he tried to call her.A few seconds ago, Rizwanur lied down on the track and smiled at the stars.
The breeze had dried up a portion of the fluids. A mobile lay wet, buzzing a popular hindi love song. His heart would have beaten one last time.
A few hours later, a mother fainted. A brother wept. And a hundred men ran around with microphones and video cams.
A few months later... who cares!!
It was a neat cut with the head a few feet away inside the track and the body lying outside on the belly.
A few years ago, he fell in love. A few months ago they got married.
A few minutes ago, he tried to call her.A few seconds ago, Rizwanur lied down on the track and smiled at the stars.
The breeze had dried up a portion of the fluids. A mobile lay wet, buzzing a popular hindi love song. His heart would have beaten one last time.
A few hours later, a mother fainted. A brother wept. And a hundred men ran around with microphones and video cams.
A few months later... who cares!!
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Sunday, July 29, 2007
The black birds of Triaqua
The sun was up from its mountain crib. The lush green grass was sparkling with the melting frost and the soggy soil was ready to sweat. The air was silent except for the mild breeze waltzing with the tall eucalyptus trees shedding their last night’s tears.
The birds in the tiny timepiece chirped 7.The old man rose and sat down on his bed. He was already hours late but somehow couldn’t shake the sleep off. Today he felt his head heavy, his eyes swollen and his mind sick. Triaqua had her morning stage set up as usual but the old man felt so unready to raise his act.
The old man came to Triaqua when he was 20 to take up his dead father’s job as a forest guard. And now he was 70.His children think he is too weak to work now. They want him back home. They want him to fly with them abroad- They don’t want him to be lonely anymore. He had to retire – He knew it.
50 years was too long for a man to remain lonely in the woods-but he wasn’t completely lonely. She was always there for him-To wake him up with her sweet breath and to tuck him into sleep with her soft lullabies. She used to drench him with her downpours and frighten him at times with her thunderous shouts. She was always there for him. She was Triaqua and he was in love with her.
The old man stood up. His legs were a bit shaky. Supporting himself on the bed, he reached for his walking stick and slowly moved to the door. The door opened and there she was- gleaming so bright that the old man had to shut his eyes tight for a moment.His eyes had lost its shine, Age has painted ugly pictures on his skin and his muscles had worn out, leaving just the skin lingering on to his bare bones in many places. But she was still the same. An extravaganza of raw beauty.
He had always had the feeling that Triaqua, though she shines so bright was so sad at times. He never found anything lively and beautiful around her except for the very rare squirrels. Maybe it’s the cold. Triaqua had no beautiful adornments. She was bright and yet sad - like a widow.
The old man raised his hands high and clapped them loud, over and over again. His eyes scanned the horizon. He could not see the approaching black spots in the sky but he could hear them flutter their wings. The black birds landed beside the old man’s feet. He emptied the plate of rice before them and watched them eat. They were black, could not sing, had an ugly black beak and had cruel eyes which showed no signs of gratitude. But he loved them. They were the messengers of Triaqua.And he had been feeding them all this time.50 years have passed and generations of black birds came and went. He had some old favorites whom he could recognize with their grey patch works. He had once decided to name them. But later decided not to, because he felt bad when suddenly one day the old “big beak” would stop coming. So he decided to treat them all alike. To believe that they were all the same, that they never left him- never left Triaqua.
The birds started to leave. The old man walked back to his door. He turned around one last time and took a deep breath. The black birds were flying back.
---------------------------------------------------------
Years had passed. Now his eyesight was pathetic and he could not stand up anymore. His children had taken him abroad to their place. He visited them in turn. They paid his air tickets. The house maids took good care of him. He played riddles with his grand children. He was happy and sometimes, before going to sleep he would think of Triaqua and her black birds.
Today is his 80th birthday. And when his son asked him what he wanted as a birthday present, he said he wanted to go back home. And so they sent him back home.
The flight took off and it flew over seas and islands. The old man sat beside the window. He looked out and saw clouds- faint white clouds and through them he saw a small green patch. And as he looked on he saw the eucalyptus trees swaying. He heard the wind whistling through them. He touched the dew drops on the glistening green grass.
He stood up and clapped his hands hard. He heard the fluttering noise of wings. He felt them land on his shoulders and lift him off his wheelchair.He felt the cold dip as they dived through the clouds.He saw them looking down at him.They were black, could not sing, had an ugly black beak and cruel eyes which showed no signs of gratitude. But he loved them. They were the black birds of Triaqua and they were taking him home.
The birds in the tiny timepiece chirped 7.The old man rose and sat down on his bed. He was already hours late but somehow couldn’t shake the sleep off. Today he felt his head heavy, his eyes swollen and his mind sick. Triaqua had her morning stage set up as usual but the old man felt so unready to raise his act.
The old man came to Triaqua when he was 20 to take up his dead father’s job as a forest guard. And now he was 70.His children think he is too weak to work now. They want him back home. They want him to fly with them abroad- They don’t want him to be lonely anymore. He had to retire – He knew it.
50 years was too long for a man to remain lonely in the woods-but he wasn’t completely lonely. She was always there for him-To wake him up with her sweet breath and to tuck him into sleep with her soft lullabies. She used to drench him with her downpours and frighten him at times with her thunderous shouts. She was always there for him. She was Triaqua and he was in love with her.
The old man stood up. His legs were a bit shaky. Supporting himself on the bed, he reached for his walking stick and slowly moved to the door. The door opened and there she was- gleaming so bright that the old man had to shut his eyes tight for a moment.His eyes had lost its shine, Age has painted ugly pictures on his skin and his muscles had worn out, leaving just the skin lingering on to his bare bones in many places. But she was still the same. An extravaganza of raw beauty.
He had always had the feeling that Triaqua, though she shines so bright was so sad at times. He never found anything lively and beautiful around her except for the very rare squirrels. Maybe it’s the cold. Triaqua had no beautiful adornments. She was bright and yet sad - like a widow.
The old man raised his hands high and clapped them loud, over and over again. His eyes scanned the horizon. He could not see the approaching black spots in the sky but he could hear them flutter their wings. The black birds landed beside the old man’s feet. He emptied the plate of rice before them and watched them eat. They were black, could not sing, had an ugly black beak and had cruel eyes which showed no signs of gratitude. But he loved them. They were the messengers of Triaqua.And he had been feeding them all this time.50 years have passed and generations of black birds came and went. He had some old favorites whom he could recognize with their grey patch works. He had once decided to name them. But later decided not to, because he felt bad when suddenly one day the old “big beak” would stop coming. So he decided to treat them all alike. To believe that they were all the same, that they never left him- never left Triaqua.
The birds started to leave. The old man walked back to his door. He turned around one last time and took a deep breath. The black birds were flying back.
---------------------------------------------------------
Years had passed. Now his eyesight was pathetic and he could not stand up anymore. His children had taken him abroad to their place. He visited them in turn. They paid his air tickets. The house maids took good care of him. He played riddles with his grand children. He was happy and sometimes, before going to sleep he would think of Triaqua and her black birds.
Today is his 80th birthday. And when his son asked him what he wanted as a birthday present, he said he wanted to go back home. And so they sent him back home.
The flight took off and it flew over seas and islands. The old man sat beside the window. He looked out and saw clouds- faint white clouds and through them he saw a small green patch. And as he looked on he saw the eucalyptus trees swaying. He heard the wind whistling through them. He touched the dew drops on the glistening green grass.
He stood up and clapped his hands hard. He heard the fluttering noise of wings. He felt them land on his shoulders and lift him off his wheelchair.He felt the cold dip as they dived through the clouds.He saw them looking down at him.They were black, could not sing, had an ugly black beak and cruel eyes which showed no signs of gratitude. But he loved them. They were the black birds of Triaqua and they were taking him home.
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Inherent Intricacies of an Indian Wedding
A few days back I got a friendly mail from a very true friend of mine. The subject line carried the “Be careful” caution as usual. I opened the mail to find a rather huge document attached. The name said it all. “Marriage.doc”
I had read many such docs before and was not very interested in reading the same old story with the actors changed. But the introduction looked different. It promised to be educative and hence was inviting. But each line I read further, plunged me into deeper and deeper levels of discontent. It was turning into the same old talking, touching and more “ing” story. That’s what made me write this blog. It’s not a “How to” article. Neither does it hold any “Shortcut to better” prefixes. It is simply impossible for a man (or should I say Kid) of my experience to write such things.
What I shall jott down here is what I feel right now - at this moment about a marrige. Ask me an hour later and I might have a completely different story to tell. These are my thoughts as of the 22nd of April 2007 -10:30 AM sharp.
This thought of getting married has got a lot less interesting and a lot more disturbing during the past many years in my case (Hmm.. Yes,I said many years.Dont know if its legal to do so at that age.Let the longs hands of law spare me for my ignorance ;-) ). And I see this growing reluctance very normal considering the fact that I am finding it hard to manage myself and more responsibility is definitely the last thing I would crave for. The act of remaining unhooked for life has also been thought over. But that lonely old age that everyone talks about, haunts me. In that sense, I see it all as a give and take game. You love your wife- she takes care of you. You raise your children – They look after you when you get old.If you dont do anything and if you are not lucky or rich enough, keep yourself healthy coz u will need a lot of that saved energy to take care of yourself.
For this reason I have always felt that Parents should be kept immortal so that you can have your Mother’s hand cooked food till your last day home. And it’s not hard taking care of your parents because mostly they take care of you. They rarely ask for costly gifts. Rarely expect you to remember their birthday’s and rarely consider you weak and useless. So I suspect. And even if they do, you can always put the blame back on them. ;-)
But sadly its not just food and shelter that man is entitled to enjoy in this world. The very old Eve and Adam story keeps selling and none can live without apples. And with so many apple trees and Eves around, its hard to withhold the temptation.
I had read many such docs before and was not very interested in reading the same old story with the actors changed. But the introduction looked different. It promised to be educative and hence was inviting. But each line I read further, plunged me into deeper and deeper levels of discontent. It was turning into the same old talking, touching and more “ing” story. That’s what made me write this blog. It’s not a “How to” article. Neither does it hold any “Shortcut to better” prefixes. It is simply impossible for a man (or should I say Kid) of my experience to write such things.
What I shall jott down here is what I feel right now - at this moment about a marrige. Ask me an hour later and I might have a completely different story to tell. These are my thoughts as of the 22nd of April 2007 -10:30 AM sharp.
This thought of getting married has got a lot less interesting and a lot more disturbing during the past many years in my case (Hmm.. Yes,I said many years.Dont know if its legal to do so at that age.Let the longs hands of law spare me for my ignorance ;-) ). And I see this growing reluctance very normal considering the fact that I am finding it hard to manage myself and more responsibility is definitely the last thing I would crave for. The act of remaining unhooked for life has also been thought over. But that lonely old age that everyone talks about, haunts me. In that sense, I see it all as a give and take game. You love your wife- she takes care of you. You raise your children – They look after you when you get old.If you dont do anything and if you are not lucky or rich enough, keep yourself healthy coz u will need a lot of that saved energy to take care of yourself.
For this reason I have always felt that Parents should be kept immortal so that you can have your Mother’s hand cooked food till your last day home. And it’s not hard taking care of your parents because mostly they take care of you. They rarely ask for costly gifts. Rarely expect you to remember their birthday’s and rarely consider you weak and useless. So I suspect. And even if they do, you can always put the blame back on them. ;-)
But sadly its not just food and shelter that man is entitled to enjoy in this world. The very old Eve and Adam story keeps selling and none can live without apples. And with so many apple trees and Eves around, its hard to withhold the temptation.
Labels:stories,india
Indian wedding,
Intricasy,
Varun Mohan,
Varzone
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
My Experiments with B tech
Sitting in the production support cubicle on a fine Saturday morning staring at Control M schedulers searching for breaking jobs, my mind takes a ride through the past. I wont let it wander too far but just a few years back. 5 years to be precise - to a hot summer day in May 2001.
DECLERATION and INITIALIZATION
----------------------------------------
It was supposed to be a shopping complex but didn’t look like one. It was just a dirty lifeless concrete building with the cement and dust yet to settle down.
I did not like the look on my mother's face. But i was happy. I am finally going to join an engineering college and though it was supposed to be a temporary affair with me preparing for the next year entrance and hopefully going to some "reputed" college as expected by my many "well-wishers", the thought of being relieved of the tons of multiple choice bullshits I would have gone through in an entrance crash course made me feel great.
It would have been around 10 o clock in the morning. The queue was pretty long and i was standing last.
I was disappointed at being stupid enough to back the analysis done by many of the "well-wishers".
I thought about the day when the entrance results came. Sounded more like the 'Little boy' hitting Hiroshima. ( Little boy is a nuclear bomb and Hiroshima is a japanese city. For those who thought otherwise :-) ). Along came the tremor, the smoke and dust of condolences and advices.
Using their immense knowledge and experience in these matters, my "well-wishers" came up with the prediction that there would not be many guys coming to join a college like this. After all who will take such stupid decisions with their life?. And moreover a guy with an entrance rank as yours is not supposed to join a college. You are a begger (to be pronounced in an Indo Butlorian accent with utter discontent.) left with no choice and will have to take what is offered. You have disgraced the fundamental laws of entrance oriented education. You should go to Trissur and get trained from the best. You should learn how to mark answers without thinking - at the blink of your eyes.You will find it very hard coz you dont have the brains to do it.But still you might make it. And then only you will succeeded in life. Very true indeed. I shall not waste my life. I shall go through it again and with the grace of god ,I might have the opportunity to get into a reputed college. I shall live happily ever after.
The day was getting hotter and the queue was moving at a snails pace. I looked around and found no faces I recognize. I saw many others but didn’t bother to talk. I didn’t know that the coming fours years would transform these unknown faces as my bench mates and best friends.
I remember the big guy leaning on a pillar dreaming with his sleepy eyes. He was so good at this that somebody had to
wake him up when his name was called. Later this guy was to become the integral part of the BBD(back bench dudes). The one and only Prabinettan.. :)
I remember seeing a glimpse of Adarsh.That was all. Later I learned this vanishing act from him and found it very useful in bunking classes.
I met Safdar- the first established chaaran and role model of other chaar aspirants.
Now was the chance for the only senior batch to have their say. They did it well by organizing a march and cautioning us of the disastrous plight we are about to suffer- of loosing recognition from the University. After having had a very eventful pre degree at SN college, I was happy to see the "samaram" and hoped to have more of it in future which was not to be.
And finally after waiting till 3 o clock in the evening I got called. I returned receiving loads of advices and inspirations from Nambiar sir.
College life in CETLY declared and successfully initialized!!
THE CODE BEGINS HERE
---------------------------
Classes commenced on some unfortunate date of the year. I was yet to loose the hangover from my PDC experience. I have now been deprived of my freedom of choice, freedom of speech and freedom of movement. Bunking classes from the two storied college was virtually impossible. Thanks to space constraints we had only half day classes.
Environment is set. Now comes the objects.
There was this tall irritating guy who had a misconception about B-tech courses. Somebody had convinced him to fill English wherever possible in his conversations with others. Some “well-wisher” might have said. “Mone u r going to become a big engineer. So behave like one.Dont talk to people in Malayalam.“
It’s said that wise men learns from mistakes. Has to agree that this guy was pretty wise. He still hates the phrase “good name” as in “What is ur good name ? “ J
This guy was to become the BUJI in BBD. The only guy who had the privilege to go to Shreads and attend tests before 7th sem. Shimith is his name!!
I wont give such lengthy descriptions to all. To keep it short I’ll name the rest
Unni- A drop out from agricultural engineering, Unni joined CETLY a few months late. Tries hard to maintain a ruf and tuf look.
Adarsh- Cool guy unconcerned and unaware of what’s happening around.
Jijin – Helpful (especially in drawing margins and picking balls) and humble guy. Gets easily agitated when talked about Communism. Looks like a communist from outside.
Mahesh – The guy who claims to have first hand experience of almost everything. Likes to become the big brother. No “doubt” goes unresolved.
Vigil (aka Raj Kumar) – Cool guy. Again claims first hand experience in many domains.
The rest of the guys can come along during the course of the story.
Life moved on. So did the college. With money flowing in as semester fees, it prospered and scaled new heights. (Around 200 feet from sea level) .Our new campus got set up in kundoormala to the utter disappointment of the many “well-wishers”. Everyone else felt good.
The silence of the sea is deceptive. You never know when the next Tsunami will hit.
And so it came. There had been rumors about it. Some said it would never come. Many others hoped. But it did come. People ran frantically from kundoormala to Delta and
back.
God’s prayer resolution server took a major hit from the hundreds of high frequency transmitters sending loads of prayers and sorrows across. Network admins spotted the site as kundoormala. But they didn’t stand a chance. The server crashed. S1S2 results were out!!. Those who prepared day and night blamed the syllabus, the teachers and the university. Others simply agreed. Many wise men learned from this mistake. Some planned to work harder. Others thought planning was simply a waste of time.They believed in actions.
BBD was confused. They weighed their options over and over again. Working harder was a good option. But what if it didn’t bring results. They were more concerned about the amount of energy that would go waste if their option failed. Taking action requires more guts and involves more risk. So they decided to do nothing.
In the afternoons they would move to the shades and enjoy the cool breeze. They will discuss and debate on a variety of issues. These mid noon discussions made immense changes in BBD (or rather kept them from changing).
Life moved on fast but in circles. The same thread ran again and again in each semester.
The flow of assignments, series exam, sem exam was basically the same. Just the logic changed every time. Sometimes good sometimes worse. And to cope with these changing requirements wise men had to come up with ingenious solutions. While the masters used enhanced secondary storage options and innovative resource sharing protocols, the cowards stuck with the traditional multichannel visual data scan options. The marks came proportional to their eye sight. Lab exams produced codes as Xerox copies of records. Unknown files of senseless lines gave expected results. People started believing in modern day miracles.
But these things are easier said than done. Sem exams were simply Chaos. Its that time of the year when you start thinking about your future. And every time you think about it ,you feel the chill right there in you belly.
It’s a time when the following four phases come into play. I call it the Btech sem exam life cyle model. (BSELC model)
1) Resource Gathering phase:-
The time of the year when people start gathering study materials. The phase starts with the search for the sem’s syllabus. Xerox machines get unusually busy during this period printing Btech textbooks. The phase ideally begins at around 3 to 4 weeks prior to the sem exam.
2) Planning phase
The MOST critical phase of all. The phase starts once all the acquirable resources are in place.Previous years question papers are thoroughly scrutinized and a consensus is reached on the distribution of marks among modules. Based on this data , people take independent decisions on how to go ahead with their preparation. Some skip chapters, Many skip modules and the remaining who cant find any feasible approach, simply skip the exam.
2) Reading phase
It’s the time when everyone gets super active. Books get attacked from all possible sides. The most energy consuming phase of all. A time when the budding engineers prepare themselves for the inevitable. Now and then the plan gets updated. Phone calls go to and fro all the time. Everyone eager to get the latest updates.
3) The day before (Hell)
The phase is marked by symptoms like lack of apatite, sleeplessness, headache and many more uniquely disturbing feelings.
In this phase you will find yourself sitting in any of the 4 corners.
Corner 1: The plan was pretty good. You feel confident about the preparation. You think about reading discarded chapters just in case something goes wrong. You brush up learned chapters once more. This corner is rarely occupied. Its there mostly for the sake of it.
Corner 2: You have lost all hopes. The plan was a disaster. You play cricket 2005 to ease the pressure.
Corner 3: You are utterly confused. You don’t know where you are. You see unrecognizable printed lines in your sleep. You feel like you know something but you won’t recollect anything you felt you knew. You hope and pray for the exam to get postponed. You start getting philosophical. You start listening to ENIGMA to ease tension. You start respecting your elders. You seriously think about quitting smoke and drink (once the exams are over) . You start giving ten rupee notes to beggars. You feel sad for stray animals. Might even go to the extend of giving them chocolates. You feel very strange .But you always have company as this corner is always full . You will have a tough time fighting for your seat.
Corner 4:
You are hyper optimistic. You think you still have a chance. You start reading..
After reading you use blades or scissors to make tiny cut outs of what you read just in case you forget.
You sit opposite to corner 2 and will find it very disturbing seeing the cool guys from corner2 laughing at you. You will fight hard not to accept corner 2 invitations. You finally end up in corner2 or corner3 but will still be confident coz you have all the bits in place.
4) D day
Everything comes down to this. You visit temples/mosque/church early in the morning. You take care not to dislodge the sandal paste marks on you forehead. You wear your lucky shirt.
In the examination hall you feel numb. Your hands shake when you write your register number. You turn around to find if anybody stays close by for a help. You start writing. You think hard about where you placed the needed bits. You think even harder whenever the invigilator looks at you.
You wish you had an owl’s eyes. You count your marks after each question you attempt. At the end you again find yourself sitting (sometimes lying down) in any of the four corners.
Corner 1:
You feel satisfied but not happy because you did not get enough time to write everything that you wanted to. You know you will score somewhere above 70 but you might choose to look unhappy so that onlookers from other corners don’t feel bad.
Corner 2:
You feel really happy. Your calculations suggest that you could score somewhere in between 45 to 50. Even after cutting down some marks you find yourself standing on the boundary line. You feel proud.
Corner 3:
You are at the mercy of the almighty. You find it very hard to cross the margin. You start adding grace marks here and there and somehow drag yourself to 45. You never stop praying.
Corner 4:
You don’t feel anything. You stop thinking about the exam. You start enquiring when the supplementary exams begin. You desperately search for company and feel relieved to find some. You drink a lime soda near the bus stand and rush home.
And then when the sem exams are gone life would be same again. The fun would be back.It will be time to take some rest for all the hard work we did in one month.And when we wake up again it would be time for yet another battle.
But one fine day everything just ended.Btech was over just like that !
And then came the most difficult times of all. The search for a job.The "well-wishers" were all back in action.Everyone just went their own way.Once in a while they'll called each other. And someday they would just loose all contacts.
Two years down the line, I am sitting here in my air conditioned office missing those hot summer days when we trotted downhill laughing loud, sharing jokes and playing pranks on each other.
I miss those downpours when people used to get inside the other guy's umbrella even if they had one in their bags.Sitting here as a decently paid software engineer with more diverse and matured worries smoking in my head, I am finding it hard not to miss my Btech days-those nail bittings and head scratchings.
But thats so and no one can change it. I am seeing red spots here and there on my screen.Recovery is gonna call me any time now.Kundoormala and Btech has to move out.Got to let some Unix and Oracle pour in.
I dont have to worry though , coz I know for sure that those golden memories will always be with me- written deep in my heart.
Every code has to be delivered some day! ;-)
DECLERATION and INITIALIZATION
----------------------------------------
It was supposed to be a shopping complex but didn’t look like one. It was just a dirty lifeless concrete building with the cement and dust yet to settle down.
I did not like the look on my mother's face. But i was happy. I am finally going to join an engineering college and though it was supposed to be a temporary affair with me preparing for the next year entrance and hopefully going to some "reputed" college as expected by my many "well-wishers", the thought of being relieved of the tons of multiple choice bullshits I would have gone through in an entrance crash course made me feel great.
It would have been around 10 o clock in the morning. The queue was pretty long and i was standing last.
I was disappointed at being stupid enough to back the analysis done by many of the "well-wishers".
I thought about the day when the entrance results came. Sounded more like the 'Little boy' hitting Hiroshima. ( Little boy is a nuclear bomb and Hiroshima is a japanese city. For those who thought otherwise :-) ). Along came the tremor, the smoke and dust of condolences and advices.
Using their immense knowledge and experience in these matters, my "well-wishers" came up with the prediction that there would not be many guys coming to join a college like this. After all who will take such stupid decisions with their life?. And moreover a guy with an entrance rank as yours is not supposed to join a college. You are a begger (to be pronounced in an Indo Butlorian accent with utter discontent.) left with no choice and will have to take what is offered. You have disgraced the fundamental laws of entrance oriented education. You should go to Trissur and get trained from the best. You should learn how to mark answers without thinking - at the blink of your eyes.You will find it very hard coz you dont have the brains to do it.But still you might make it. And then only you will succeeded in life. Very true indeed. I shall not waste my life. I shall go through it again and with the grace of god ,I might have the opportunity to get into a reputed college. I shall live happily ever after.
The day was getting hotter and the queue was moving at a snails pace. I looked around and found no faces I recognize. I saw many others but didn’t bother to talk. I didn’t know that the coming fours years would transform these unknown faces as my bench mates and best friends.
I remember the big guy leaning on a pillar dreaming with his sleepy eyes. He was so good at this that somebody had to
wake him up when his name was called. Later this guy was to become the integral part of the BBD(back bench dudes). The one and only Prabinettan.. :)
I remember seeing a glimpse of Adarsh.That was all. Later I learned this vanishing act from him and found it very useful in bunking classes.
I met Safdar- the first established chaaran and role model of other chaar aspirants.
Now was the chance for the only senior batch to have their say. They did it well by organizing a march and cautioning us of the disastrous plight we are about to suffer- of loosing recognition from the University. After having had a very eventful pre degree at SN college, I was happy to see the "samaram" and hoped to have more of it in future which was not to be.
And finally after waiting till 3 o clock in the evening I got called. I returned receiving loads of advices and inspirations from Nambiar sir.
College life in CETLY declared and successfully initialized!!
THE CODE BEGINS HERE
---------------------------
Classes commenced on some unfortunate date of the year. I was yet to loose the hangover from my PDC experience. I have now been deprived of my freedom of choice, freedom of speech and freedom of movement. Bunking classes from the two storied college was virtually impossible. Thanks to space constraints we had only half day classes.
Environment is set. Now comes the objects.
There was this tall irritating guy who had a misconception about B-tech courses. Somebody had convinced him to fill English wherever possible in his conversations with others. Some “well-wisher” might have said. “Mone u r going to become a big engineer. So behave like one.Dont talk to people in Malayalam.“
It’s said that wise men learns from mistakes. Has to agree that this guy was pretty wise. He still hates the phrase “good name” as in “What is ur good name ? “ J
This guy was to become the BUJI in BBD. The only guy who had the privilege to go to Shreads and attend tests before 7th sem. Shimith is his name!!
I wont give such lengthy descriptions to all. To keep it short I’ll name the rest
Unni- A drop out from agricultural engineering, Unni joined CETLY a few months late. Tries hard to maintain a ruf and tuf look.
Adarsh- Cool guy unconcerned and unaware of what’s happening around.
Jijin – Helpful (especially in drawing margins and picking balls) and humble guy. Gets easily agitated when talked about Communism. Looks like a communist from outside.
Mahesh – The guy who claims to have first hand experience of almost everything. Likes to become the big brother. No “doubt” goes unresolved.
Vigil (aka Raj Kumar) – Cool guy. Again claims first hand experience in many domains.
The rest of the guys can come along during the course of the story.
Life moved on. So did the college. With money flowing in as semester fees, it prospered and scaled new heights. (Around 200 feet from sea level) .Our new campus got set up in kundoormala to the utter disappointment of the many “well-wishers”. Everyone else felt good.
The silence of the sea is deceptive. You never know when the next Tsunami will hit.
And so it came. There had been rumors about it. Some said it would never come. Many others hoped. But it did come. People ran frantically from kundoormala to Delta and
back.
God’s prayer resolution server took a major hit from the hundreds of high frequency transmitters sending loads of prayers and sorrows across. Network admins spotted the site as kundoormala. But they didn’t stand a chance. The server crashed. S1S2 results were out!!. Those who prepared day and night blamed the syllabus, the teachers and the university. Others simply agreed. Many wise men learned from this mistake. Some planned to work harder. Others thought planning was simply a waste of time.They believed in actions.
BBD was confused. They weighed their options over and over again. Working harder was a good option. But what if it didn’t bring results. They were more concerned about the amount of energy that would go waste if their option failed. Taking action requires more guts and involves more risk. So they decided to do nothing.
In the afternoons they would move to the shades and enjoy the cool breeze. They will discuss and debate on a variety of issues. These mid noon discussions made immense changes in BBD (or rather kept them from changing).
Life moved on fast but in circles. The same thread ran again and again in each semester.
The flow of assignments, series exam, sem exam was basically the same. Just the logic changed every time. Sometimes good sometimes worse. And to cope with these changing requirements wise men had to come up with ingenious solutions. While the masters used enhanced secondary storage options and innovative resource sharing protocols, the cowards stuck with the traditional multichannel visual data scan options. The marks came proportional to their eye sight. Lab exams produced codes as Xerox copies of records. Unknown files of senseless lines gave expected results. People started believing in modern day miracles.
But these things are easier said than done. Sem exams were simply Chaos. Its that time of the year when you start thinking about your future. And every time you think about it ,you feel the chill right there in you belly.
It’s a time when the following four phases come into play. I call it the Btech sem exam life cyle model. (BSELC model)
1) Resource Gathering phase:-
The time of the year when people start gathering study materials. The phase starts with the search for the sem’s syllabus. Xerox machines get unusually busy during this period printing Btech textbooks. The phase ideally begins at around 3 to 4 weeks prior to the sem exam.
2) Planning phase
The MOST critical phase of all. The phase starts once all the acquirable resources are in place.Previous years question papers are thoroughly scrutinized and a consensus is reached on the distribution of marks among modules. Based on this data , people take independent decisions on how to go ahead with their preparation. Some skip chapters, Many skip modules and the remaining who cant find any feasible approach, simply skip the exam.
2) Reading phase
It’s the time when everyone gets super active. Books get attacked from all possible sides. The most energy consuming phase of all. A time when the budding engineers prepare themselves for the inevitable. Now and then the plan gets updated. Phone calls go to and fro all the time. Everyone eager to get the latest updates.
3) The day before (Hell)
The phase is marked by symptoms like lack of apatite, sleeplessness, headache and many more uniquely disturbing feelings.
In this phase you will find yourself sitting in any of the 4 corners.
Corner 1: The plan was pretty good. You feel confident about the preparation. You think about reading discarded chapters just in case something goes wrong. You brush up learned chapters once more. This corner is rarely occupied. Its there mostly for the sake of it.
Corner 2: You have lost all hopes. The plan was a disaster. You play cricket 2005 to ease the pressure.
Corner 3: You are utterly confused. You don’t know where you are. You see unrecognizable printed lines in your sleep. You feel like you know something but you won’t recollect anything you felt you knew. You hope and pray for the exam to get postponed. You start getting philosophical. You start listening to ENIGMA to ease tension. You start respecting your elders. You seriously think about quitting smoke and drink (once the exams are over) . You start giving ten rupee notes to beggars. You feel sad for stray animals. Might even go to the extend of giving them chocolates. You feel very strange .But you always have company as this corner is always full . You will have a tough time fighting for your seat.
Corner 4:
You are hyper optimistic. You think you still have a chance. You start reading..
After reading you use blades or scissors to make tiny cut outs of what you read just in case you forget.
You sit opposite to corner 2 and will find it very disturbing seeing the cool guys from corner2 laughing at you. You will fight hard not to accept corner 2 invitations. You finally end up in corner2 or corner3 but will still be confident coz you have all the bits in place.
4) D day
Everything comes down to this. You visit temples/mosque/church early in the morning. You take care not to dislodge the sandal paste marks on you forehead. You wear your lucky shirt.
In the examination hall you feel numb. Your hands shake when you write your register number. You turn around to find if anybody stays close by for a help. You start writing. You think hard about where you placed the needed bits. You think even harder whenever the invigilator looks at you.
You wish you had an owl’s eyes. You count your marks after each question you attempt. At the end you again find yourself sitting (sometimes lying down) in any of the four corners.
Corner 1:
You feel satisfied but not happy because you did not get enough time to write everything that you wanted to. You know you will score somewhere above 70 but you might choose to look unhappy so that onlookers from other corners don’t feel bad.
Corner 2:
You feel really happy. Your calculations suggest that you could score somewhere in between 45 to 50. Even after cutting down some marks you find yourself standing on the boundary line. You feel proud.
Corner 3:
You are at the mercy of the almighty. You find it very hard to cross the margin. You start adding grace marks here and there and somehow drag yourself to 45. You never stop praying.
Corner 4:
You don’t feel anything. You stop thinking about the exam. You start enquiring when the supplementary exams begin. You desperately search for company and feel relieved to find some. You drink a lime soda near the bus stand and rush home.
And then when the sem exams are gone life would be same again. The fun would be back.It will be time to take some rest for all the hard work we did in one month.And when we wake up again it would be time for yet another battle.
But one fine day everything just ended.Btech was over just like that !
And then came the most difficult times of all. The search for a job.The "well-wishers" were all back in action.Everyone just went their own way.Once in a while they'll called each other. And someday they would just loose all contacts.
Two years down the line, I am sitting here in my air conditioned office missing those hot summer days when we trotted downhill laughing loud, sharing jokes and playing pranks on each other.
I miss those downpours when people used to get inside the other guy's umbrella even if they had one in their bags.Sitting here as a decently paid software engineer with more diverse and matured worries smoking in my head, I am finding it hard not to miss my Btech days-those nail bittings and head scratchings.
But thats so and no one can change it. I am seeing red spots here and there on my screen.Recovery is gonna call me any time now.Kundoormala and Btech has to move out.Got to let some Unix and Oracle pour in.
I dont have to worry though , coz I know for sure that those golden memories will always be with me- written deep in my heart.
Every code has to be delivered some day! ;-)
Sunday, March 11, 2007
The Corporate
It’s hard to be yourself and say what you think or even think what you feel in a corporate world.
If you think that weekly team meetings are a mere waste of time which of course is not a recent finding, you are sure to be marked for not being a team player. If you thought cultural activities and events were optional, think again. You are turning into a useless corporate introvert and may eventually perish starving for visibility. And u might think -Hey my company’s chairman wrote a mail saying not to stay back after 6 .So I shall finish my work in time and dash off. This is were u make the fatal mistake as the corporate moron crawling up above you in the ladder is not in a position to cultivate the same feeling as the old retiring chairman who is searching his way down. You might even go to the extend of thinking that all those leaves that get credited are meant to be taken. NO. Those leaves get credited because the law says so. And finally you might think that doing smart work does the trick. You are terribly mistaken, all you need is a wide mouth and a well lubricated tongue to make up for your stammering brain. Ofcourse whatever you say must be cleverly fabricated into impressive jargons so that the guy who’s listening ,who obviously has no idea on what’s happening, feels good.
And finally when the appraisal results are out, you might feel like kicking your PM to death. Don’t even think of trying that – not because you will see the way out, but someday you might be on the receiving end. To put it straight, its your shadow that you see in your PM- A shadow from the future. A shadow so horribly entrapped in the corporate web that there’s no way out. It’s a ladder that will take you up and only up it will go. And as you take each step, you are tempted and pushed from all sides to take the next one, no matter how hard and damaging it may be. You may never get the chance to remain stagnant unless someone walks over you leaving you behind,dead and disgraced. And if you don’t want that to happen to you, better learn some descent back stabbing. The options are wide open. The only question that remains is whether it’s worth it??
If you think that weekly team meetings are a mere waste of time which of course is not a recent finding, you are sure to be marked for not being a team player. If you thought cultural activities and events were optional, think again. You are turning into a useless corporate introvert and may eventually perish starving for visibility. And u might think -Hey my company’s chairman wrote a mail saying not to stay back after 6 .So I shall finish my work in time and dash off. This is were u make the fatal mistake as the corporate moron crawling up above you in the ladder is not in a position to cultivate the same feeling as the old retiring chairman who is searching his way down. You might even go to the extend of thinking that all those leaves that get credited are meant to be taken. NO. Those leaves get credited because the law says so. And finally you might think that doing smart work does the trick. You are terribly mistaken, all you need is a wide mouth and a well lubricated tongue to make up for your stammering brain. Ofcourse whatever you say must be cleverly fabricated into impressive jargons so that the guy who’s listening ,who obviously has no idea on what’s happening, feels good.
And finally when the appraisal results are out, you might feel like kicking your PM to death. Don’t even think of trying that – not because you will see the way out, but someday you might be on the receiving end. To put it straight, its your shadow that you see in your PM- A shadow from the future. A shadow so horribly entrapped in the corporate web that there’s no way out. It’s a ladder that will take you up and only up it will go. And as you take each step, you are tempted and pushed from all sides to take the next one, no matter how hard and damaging it may be. You may never get the chance to remain stagnant unless someone walks over you leaving you behind,dead and disgraced. And if you don’t want that to happen to you, better learn some descent back stabbing. The options are wide open. The only question that remains is whether it’s worth it??
Sunday, March 4, 2007
Computers - Some crazy thoughts
Can computers get smarter than humans? Will there be a future when humans will give way to robots. A future dominated by brains and void of hearts. A future with no love, no breakups, no shouts of joy, no painful tears.
A future where every action is accountably aimed at preprogrammed results.
A future when people would admire the foresight of 21st century Hollywood film makers?
Could there be a future when the reigning species of this world would no longer be of a divine origin?
A few years back, these were just crazy thoughts that could come to anybody’s mind. But time has been grating away the craziness out of them. We are in a present which is galloping towards the future so fast that we are almost living in the past.
The upper half of the 21st century witnessed a modern day evolution. The evolution of computers. From vacuum tubes to transistors to ICs and Microprocessors it flourished at an astounding pace.
The cyber evolution can be compared in many ways to the natural one. First came the dinosaurs, the billion dollar monsters which can haunt you with its complexity and humble you with its performance. People were happy with them then. Nobody even had the vaguest idea on how the modern computers would look like.
People were so happy with their masterpiece that Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM in the 1940s once said "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
Had Sherlock Homes been a bit more serious, this could have been the joke of the millennium. By 2010 the number of computer users is expected to be 1 billion!!.
The point is that computers are evolving- just like we all evolved from our hairy ancestors. The only difference being that they are evolving at a rate incomparable to ours. The old obese machines have been replaced by sleek Palmtops in less than half a century’s time. But now we know that it isn’t the end of it. Those cool expensive gadgets start their trot to the trash box right from the day they are launched.
You will be an outdated techie if that’s a 6 month old mobile you have in your pocket. Somewhere in Japan someone would have already launched a 6 times faster 6 times smaller gadget at almost the same price.
So will there be a time when technology would be so advanced that humans will have equal counterparts from science. Will there be a time when robots with an IQ comparable to our’s share a space in this world? To answer this lets take a quick glance into the past. Some 60 years back, engineers worked on billion dollar machines that spanned across rooms, used paper punched cards for storage and manually switched complex circuits to perform a desired operation. Few decades down the line, I am sitting here in my cubicle writing some crap on my PC with my flat panel LCD screen adjusted to the right color and contrast - scrolling across windows using my LED mouse- blaming my 512 MB RAM to be two low.
And who am I to speak. Some guys in Japan are making their robots play football tournaments every year. Each year they learn new tactics, playing smarter and faster all by their own - through AI. The 100 megabyte hard drive that weighed two and a quarter tons and cost more than US$130,000 in 1968 has his grandson carrying 100 times more memory and a size so small that u it can get lost in your pocket. So the whole of cyber history has its finger pointing towards one simple fact. Computers will grow smarter and intelligent as humans. But can they grow smarter? Can they cross the line of human IQ and go beyond it to an extend were humans will no longer control them. On the contrary can we have a fate of being controlled by machines we gave birth to? A horrifying yet interesting scenario to brood over.
It is quite clear that man will someday make a machine as intelligent as him. The question is can he make it smarter? Before we conclude on this lets take a look at the current computer architecture. I am not planning to go into the real physical architecture as I am unaware of it. I am talking about the conceptual one.
I feel that a computer is a highly inefficient replica of a human body. It has a brain that is under developed, input devices performing functions similar to our sense organs. Almost all part of the human body is an output device.
To be more precise, let’s consider a guy watching a movie. His eyes receive the light signals from the screen, sends it to his brain. The brain processes these light signals and interprets them into images. Now let’s see how a computer reads a CD. The CD player picks the binary data from the CD which is then send to the CPU. The CPU interprets these meaningless streams of 0s and 1s to images based on some pre defined algorithm.
So where does the difference between a human and a computer come from? Is it the memory that’s different or is it the processor? I say its both. Humans really fall short when it comes to processing speed and memory power when compared to a modern day computer. Then where exactly is the spark that makes us smarter than computers.
Definitely it’s not the hardware which is supreme and if it isn’t the hardware it’s got to be the software. Given below is a text from an interesting forward mail I received. Do take a look.
"hi evrey bdoy
I cdnuolt blveiee taht i cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht i was rdanieg the phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at cmabrigde uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer inwaht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porblem. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and i awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt "
Hmm.. My MS Word has put red lines all under it.
But my brain understood all. How could this be possible? Definitely it has nothing to do with memory or processing speed. It’s just that somehow my inbuilt word processor works much better than what Bill Gates and his engineers coded in years.
So I feel the OS is what differentiates man from other living/non living entities. An OS powered with almost all features one could think of. An OS compatible with almost any application at the same time susceptible to Viruses making men go crazy. An OS coded in a language which nobody could ever read. Or so I suspect.
So if man has to make a machine intelligent than him, he needs to design an OS that is more powerful than the human brain.
Considering the fact that we ourselves couldn’t completely decode the complexities of our brain and are left with a lot of unanswered questions which eventually points to the almighty, I see the possibilities of such an OS a far cry from the present.
But we have always relied on scientific advancements on such areas. People have always claimed that one day science would unravel the whole mystery of our existence itself. If we go by these arguments we have to believe that science will someday allow man to create something which can go beyond his spectrum of intelligence.
But here is where you can go really crazy thinking. Human beings are intelligent animals which he owes to his complex mind or OS– agreed. But somehow I have this feeling that there is a threshold upto which our brain can take us. It may vary from individual to individual, but it should exist. Assuming so, can man ever think beyond what his brain allows him to? I think not. Lets take a simple example.
A rat has a brain which is much smaller than ours. But it is intelligent enough to go search for food, find shelter, sense danger and reproduce. I am taking a wide guess on how a rat would perceive the world around it. People chasing rats are a common household event. Why does the rat run? Is it because it knows that human’s are intelligent than itself and could potentially cause its death? I think not? I feel the rat run’s because it feels it knows how to fool a human. It feels his brain is smarter than the guy running behind. Or maybe not. But I am forced to believe that a rat also has a perception of this world and could give you reasons for the many phenomenons that happen around him. He might also have a theory for seasonal changes, for the sky, the moon, the sun. And he might also have a lot of unanswered questions. But can he ever reach a stage where he would answer the mysteries around him. Will there be a Newton rat or Einstein rat who could provide answers to his fellow rats. That would be very interesting. But I think NO.
No rat would ever find out why really some cheese tastes better than another. Why sometimes it’s cold around and sometimes its hot. A rat might know that a white piece of cheese tastes than a black one. But he may never know why the cheese really got black. The reason being that its brain doesn’t allow him to think so.
So we will have to conclude that man cannot simply build something beyond his intelligence horizon for the simple reason that his OS will never permit him to do so.
But here we have two possibilities
One scenario is that our OS utilizes the maximum of our hardware (brain) and cant go any further. This is a dead end. Nothing more can be talked or written about this.
But there is another interesting possibility –
A software engineer can write a code on multiple machines, using multiple languages, using a variety of logics. One may be better than the other. But we can never say that we have the best ever code. Anything can be done in a different way to make it better or worse. I feel that there can never exist a perfect code.
So is there a way by which we can understand our OS and maybe code it differently?
Considering the fact that our mind got installed right when we came to this world and has been getting upgraded as we grow, it is obvious that the coding was automated. So what is that which triggers this upgradation?
For every action there is a cause that triggers it. Everything in this universe abides by this rule.All except the creation of universe which scientists believe to be due to a "big bang". The cause for that initial cause is ofcource unknown. Even scientists have to take refuge in the devine intervention here. But that’s a different story. In our case there should be some command which upgrades our OS automatically at different stages in our life.
In Hindu mythology it is said that "The answers to all your questions are within you". Maybe we just need to ask the right questions to ourselves. Maybe we just need to frame the right query and wait for the answers. I think this was exactly what the Rishis and Saints of olden times tried to do. To decode our OS - To ask the right questions. To recode it as we require.Many would have gone really mad doing this . They would have messed up everything. But some would have succeeded. And they would have been considered as Avatar’s of god. People would have started worshiping them.
Maybe these are all just stupid crazy thoughts that comes to an overworked software engineer's mind when he gets a little time to spare. But its an intriguing one.
Anyways I have had enough of this. Got to stop this now. ADIOS.. Crazy Comments Invited :)
A future where every action is accountably aimed at preprogrammed results.
A future when people would admire the foresight of 21st century Hollywood film makers?
Could there be a future when the reigning species of this world would no longer be of a divine origin?
A few years back, these were just crazy thoughts that could come to anybody’s mind. But time has been grating away the craziness out of them. We are in a present which is galloping towards the future so fast that we are almost living in the past.
The upper half of the 21st century witnessed a modern day evolution. The evolution of computers. From vacuum tubes to transistors to ICs and Microprocessors it flourished at an astounding pace.
The cyber evolution can be compared in many ways to the natural one. First came the dinosaurs, the billion dollar monsters which can haunt you with its complexity and humble you with its performance. People were happy with them then. Nobody even had the vaguest idea on how the modern computers would look like.
People were so happy with their masterpiece that Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM in the 1940s once said "I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
Had Sherlock Homes been a bit more serious, this could have been the joke of the millennium. By 2010 the number of computer users is expected to be 1 billion!!.
The point is that computers are evolving- just like we all evolved from our hairy ancestors. The only difference being that they are evolving at a rate incomparable to ours. The old obese machines have been replaced by sleek Palmtops in less than half a century’s time. But now we know that it isn’t the end of it. Those cool expensive gadgets start their trot to the trash box right from the day they are launched.
You will be an outdated techie if that’s a 6 month old mobile you have in your pocket. Somewhere in Japan someone would have already launched a 6 times faster 6 times smaller gadget at almost the same price.
So will there be a time when technology would be so advanced that humans will have equal counterparts from science. Will there be a time when robots with an IQ comparable to our’s share a space in this world? To answer this lets take a quick glance into the past. Some 60 years back, engineers worked on billion dollar machines that spanned across rooms, used paper punched cards for storage and manually switched complex circuits to perform a desired operation. Few decades down the line, I am sitting here in my cubicle writing some crap on my PC with my flat panel LCD screen adjusted to the right color and contrast - scrolling across windows using my LED mouse- blaming my 512 MB RAM to be two low.
And who am I to speak. Some guys in Japan are making their robots play football tournaments every year. Each year they learn new tactics, playing smarter and faster all by their own - through AI. The 100 megabyte hard drive that weighed two and a quarter tons and cost more than US$130,000 in 1968 has his grandson carrying 100 times more memory and a size so small that u it can get lost in your pocket. So the whole of cyber history has its finger pointing towards one simple fact. Computers will grow smarter and intelligent as humans. But can they grow smarter? Can they cross the line of human IQ and go beyond it to an extend were humans will no longer control them. On the contrary can we have a fate of being controlled by machines we gave birth to? A horrifying yet interesting scenario to brood over.
It is quite clear that man will someday make a machine as intelligent as him. The question is can he make it smarter? Before we conclude on this lets take a look at the current computer architecture. I am not planning to go into the real physical architecture as I am unaware of it. I am talking about the conceptual one.
I feel that a computer is a highly inefficient replica of a human body. It has a brain that is under developed, input devices performing functions similar to our sense organs. Almost all part of the human body is an output device.
To be more precise, let’s consider a guy watching a movie. His eyes receive the light signals from the screen, sends it to his brain. The brain processes these light signals and interprets them into images. Now let’s see how a computer reads a CD. The CD player picks the binary data from the CD which is then send to the CPU. The CPU interprets these meaningless streams of 0s and 1s to images based on some pre defined algorithm.
So where does the difference between a human and a computer come from? Is it the memory that’s different or is it the processor? I say its both. Humans really fall short when it comes to processing speed and memory power when compared to a modern day computer. Then where exactly is the spark that makes us smarter than computers.
Definitely it’s not the hardware which is supreme and if it isn’t the hardware it’s got to be the software. Given below is a text from an interesting forward mail I received. Do take a look.
"hi evrey bdoy
I cdnuolt blveiee taht i cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht i was rdanieg the phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at cmabrigde uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer inwaht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porblem. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? yaeh and i awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt "
Hmm.. My MS Word has put red lines all under it.
But my brain understood all. How could this be possible? Definitely it has nothing to do with memory or processing speed. It’s just that somehow my inbuilt word processor works much better than what Bill Gates and his engineers coded in years.
So I feel the OS is what differentiates man from other living/non living entities. An OS powered with almost all features one could think of. An OS compatible with almost any application at the same time susceptible to Viruses making men go crazy. An OS coded in a language which nobody could ever read. Or so I suspect.
So if man has to make a machine intelligent than him, he needs to design an OS that is more powerful than the human brain.
Considering the fact that we ourselves couldn’t completely decode the complexities of our brain and are left with a lot of unanswered questions which eventually points to the almighty, I see the possibilities of such an OS a far cry from the present.
But we have always relied on scientific advancements on such areas. People have always claimed that one day science would unravel the whole mystery of our existence itself. If we go by these arguments we have to believe that science will someday allow man to create something which can go beyond his spectrum of intelligence.
But here is where you can go really crazy thinking. Human beings are intelligent animals which he owes to his complex mind or OS– agreed. But somehow I have this feeling that there is a threshold upto which our brain can take us. It may vary from individual to individual, but it should exist. Assuming so, can man ever think beyond what his brain allows him to? I think not. Lets take a simple example.
A rat has a brain which is much smaller than ours. But it is intelligent enough to go search for food, find shelter, sense danger and reproduce. I am taking a wide guess on how a rat would perceive the world around it. People chasing rats are a common household event. Why does the rat run? Is it because it knows that human’s are intelligent than itself and could potentially cause its death? I think not? I feel the rat run’s because it feels it knows how to fool a human. It feels his brain is smarter than the guy running behind. Or maybe not. But I am forced to believe that a rat also has a perception of this world and could give you reasons for the many phenomenons that happen around him. He might also have a theory for seasonal changes, for the sky, the moon, the sun. And he might also have a lot of unanswered questions. But can he ever reach a stage where he would answer the mysteries around him. Will there be a Newton rat or Einstein rat who could provide answers to his fellow rats. That would be very interesting. But I think NO.
No rat would ever find out why really some cheese tastes better than another. Why sometimes it’s cold around and sometimes its hot. A rat might know that a white piece of cheese tastes than a black one. But he may never know why the cheese really got black. The reason being that its brain doesn’t allow him to think so.
So we will have to conclude that man cannot simply build something beyond his intelligence horizon for the simple reason that his OS will never permit him to do so.
But here we have two possibilities
One scenario is that our OS utilizes the maximum of our hardware (brain) and cant go any further. This is a dead end. Nothing more can be talked or written about this.
But there is another interesting possibility –
A software engineer can write a code on multiple machines, using multiple languages, using a variety of logics. One may be better than the other. But we can never say that we have the best ever code. Anything can be done in a different way to make it better or worse. I feel that there can never exist a perfect code.
So is there a way by which we can understand our OS and maybe code it differently?
Considering the fact that our mind got installed right when we came to this world and has been getting upgraded as we grow, it is obvious that the coding was automated. So what is that which triggers this upgradation?
For every action there is a cause that triggers it. Everything in this universe abides by this rule.All except the creation of universe which scientists believe to be due to a "big bang". The cause for that initial cause is ofcource unknown. Even scientists have to take refuge in the devine intervention here. But that’s a different story. In our case there should be some command which upgrades our OS automatically at different stages in our life.
In Hindu mythology it is said that "The answers to all your questions are within you". Maybe we just need to ask the right questions to ourselves. Maybe we just need to frame the right query and wait for the answers. I think this was exactly what the Rishis and Saints of olden times tried to do. To decode our OS - To ask the right questions. To recode it as we require.Many would have gone really mad doing this . They would have messed up everything. But some would have succeeded. And they would have been considered as Avatar’s of god. People would have started worshiping them.
Maybe these are all just stupid crazy thoughts that comes to an overworked software engineer's mind when he gets a little time to spare. But its an intriguing one.
Anyways I have had enough of this. Got to stop this now. ADIOS.. Crazy Comments Invited :)
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